Don "The Enforcer" Apodaca is the senior producer of Artificial Turf. His unique observations on sports and life will be displayed here on a daily basis. Well, almost daily. If he has something to write about he will, if not he won't. Check in frequently to get into the mind of Don. It's a nice place to visit...but you certainly don't want to live there.
"Hi Turf listeners and readers of this website. I'm at Turf headquarters and the crew has encouraged me to write my trials and tribulations on this page instead of telling it to them. I'll be discussing my various missions on this site, although, for security reasons, I won't be able to talk about everything. Thanks for reading and your feedback is encouraged at artificialturf2003@yahoo.com." D.A.
APRIL 7, 2008
I'm embarking on a journey today that will take me through three states and Mexico. My travels will take me to my uncle's wedding in Phoenix. This is a dangerous excursion for me because the wedding has planted the "I want to get married to Don seed" in her head. Her mom, with her talk of grandchildren is not helping my cause. She even calls my dog her grandson and refers to herself as grandma around Nico the chocolate lab.
< Nico the amazing canine. Actually, this is not Nico. But he looks just like Nico. I guess you could say its a Nico impersonator.
I'm going to visit a copper mine which could of course collapse and end my burgeoning career. I'm also going to visit Juarez, Mexico because my dad wants to go visit. He's bringing The Enforcer along for protection. Who is going to protect me is the question.
If things go according to plan, I'll have future updates soon. If I meet with foul play, well, Kevin can do all the Sunday night Turf sports updates.
Thanks and check back soon.
April 15th 2008
I just got back from vacation.... sorry daily readers I probably should have waited to start this page until after vacation. I went on a road trip to New Mexico, Mexico and Arizona. New Mexico is a beautiful place. Santa Fe was our (my parents and I) first stop. My dad said Santa Fe has turned into Boulder, Co. There are so many hippies.... I got asked for money more times in Santa Fe than in Mexico... read what you want to into that! The next day we drove to Las Cruces which is a great town, I went on an ATV through the white sands mountains.... then the Next day we went to Juarez, Mexico. which is on the border of El Paso, Texas.... We hopped in a taxi right across from the border on the U.S. side we got dropped off at a mercado three blocks inside mexico.... Immedietly we were confronted by 8 mexican nationals ready to be at our beck and call.... Every single one asked if I wanted a beer, I think for five bucks they would have brought me a beer on their hands and knees..... but we waded past the first wave of what I will call my new best friends then you get into the market or mercado and every person in there is more pushier than a salesman at a dealin doug kids car dealership. I think I could hire one to be my personal butler he could sleep in my storage space... probably three dollars an hour or ten bucks a day definetly cheaper than an american butler... I bought a present for my girlfriend then I saw a cleveland indians wall hanging and negotiated it down to 15 bucks ( because I knew that no cleveland fan will ever be in Juarez Mexico again and they were lucky I was interested in this merchandise.) We almost got robbed walking down an alley about twenty minutes later. The guy said he had a knife in his pocket but I wasnt buying it. Right then a couple federales walked by.Then I went to the bathroom and almost used the water to wash my face but I stopped and thought about Montezumas revenge that my friend Billy got when we went to mexico senior year in high school. We stopped by a club called the Kentucky club that my dad said has not changed in the 43 years he has been going there. I dont think they cleaned up the place in that long either. The whole purpose of the trip was to go to my uncles wedding who lives in Glendale, Arizona. I went to a Diamondbacks - Rockies game on sat at Chase field and saw and toured the university of phoenix stadium walked by the suns arena and the coyotes arena. Phoenix has a stadium for every professional team,( cardinals, coyotes, suns, D-backs) plus they have Arizona State stadium and several baseball spring training teams... I could live there for sure. Back to the wedding ... It was an hawaiian affair ( which will be the most comfortable wedding I go to this year because after my cousins July 4th wedding (who gets married on our countrys birthday) I have to wear a brown tuxedo in a church that doesnt have air-conditioning. I think i'll look like the ladies man The wedding's official color scheme is brown and blue.
After the wedding which I had to dance at. We left back home for Denver... which I swear I will never go on another road trip with my mom unless i'm asleep or she's asleep the whole time. Overall it was a fun experience. Half my weddings for this summer are over. The best cake i've had this year was the first wedding I went to. Who knew the groom could get his own cake. Greman chocolate for the record. Sorry for all the wedding talk but that is all my friends and family talk to me about all day long. I'll check back in maybe tomorrow and deal with the nuggets playoffs. DPA
April 18th 2008 Title: doing your job
Here at turfsports headquarters I have other duties with besides Bill telling me what to do all the time. I work during the week also. This week I clashed with the new security officer we have here. He is so by the book it's ridiculous. The old security guard knew about the radio station and knew that people would come upstairs at night-time. The new guy makes everybody sign in even if you have a pass. The old security guard knew that no one parked in the parking lot at night-time except for janitors and people at the radio station. So we could park wherever we wanted. The new guy puts these parking violations on my car. They dont even charge anything because they can't. I throw them on the ground because it's ridiculous. No one else has got a violation.
The old security guard was very nice for an old timer. The new guy is wound so tight he sh*ts pearls. It's ridiculous. I brought my dog here because he was sick and I had to watch him at night. The old security guard was cool with it because he understood you know stuff happens sometimes. The new security guard flipped out on me and said quote. " you know I have to tell on you". So I said," no you don't." I explained why I have to watch my dog and he didn't care. I said this to him, " look I have a job too, but you never let anything slide. Why?" He replied with," those are the rules." I said "don't you have to secure the building or something?" "Nobody would even know that I parked there and I brought my dog here if you dont say anything." He is so bored and oblivious that he can't like take it easy. He doesn't know how to have a good time. He probably doesn't have any friends and its not easy to figure out why. The point is nobody is here at night when I work. I'm the last person to leave the building every night. The janitors park in visitor parking. Everyone else who works at the radio station at night-time parks in visitor parking. A guy that works here brings his rabbit up here. I saw the building manager bring her dog up to the building. I think he is prejudice against me. I'm going to talk to a lawyer.
Just an example of what happens here at night -time. The guy looks for something wrong with what you're doing. He's a security guard. Not a rocket scientist. He is supposed to be protecting me.... not harrassing me. His job is not life or death. His name is Ed. I feel sorry for him. The last security guard got fired because he let someone in after business hours and that person had the code to their old office door and trashed their old place. But no one told the old security guard that the guy had been fired. The old security guard was a scapegoat turning our building into some kind of communist compound at night -time. We used to give the old security guard pizza when we had a late night at the station... NO MORE.... I' going to spit on the walls here everyday until he is fired. I might start a website to get a new building manager and new security guard that worries about the building... not what the people that work here are doing. By the way there is no security here in the daytime so people can park wherever they want. At everybodies job you have some discretion. People know when they can get away with stuff or can procrastinate or cut corners sometimes. The new guy Ed is just ridiculous Period. Tom was the old security guard.... I miss you Tom. DPA
The Anwser April 22nd, 2008
128- 114 game one.
The Nuggets had very few good things happening on Sunday and i'm not talking about how Melo and A.I. went for 30 each. High point number one Linus Klieza scored ten nuggets points in a row to extend Denver's lead to 9 . Then coach George Karl put Melo back in and after two bad melo shots where *gasp* maybe anthony should have passed out of the double team. The Nuggets were tied then and held the score close until half-time. Good thing number two( or so I thought until a halftime interview) Kenyon Martin was guarding Kobe very well on the perimeter. So the Lakers just fed the ball to Pau Gasol ( which the lakers got for nothing from the welfare case Memphis Grizzlies). So of the good things that happened in the game: one was negated by Karl putting the ball hog back in and not getting the ball to the hot shooter. The other move by Karl was making Pau Gasol beat you and he definetly did. The Lakers had so many easy lay-ups and they didn't miss many.
At the ABC halftime interview with Gasol. He said, " we(the lakers) need to stop taking perimeter shots and just feed the ball inside because we can get any shot we want." That's the adjustment the Lakers made during halftime. Which led to the blow-out being commenced in the third quarter. What did the Nuggets change?
Does it look like it will be another first round exit from the playoffs this year? Does the team need to make changes? The anwser to both of these questions is yes becasue of a number of reasons. Here's why, the chemistry, coaching, and upper-management. Denver has about as much chemistry as Barry Bonds and Jeff Kent. It doesn't look like Denver players like each-other very much. Clearly they have stopped listening to their coach as Melo puts up any shot he wants and doesn't play defense. What will solve this?
I might have the anwser, Larry Brown. I know he is really old and will take big money to sign him but, A. George Karl has had health problems and usually doesn't stay longer than four years with a team. And B Iverson knows Larry Browns system and it would not be a very hard transition with the pieces the Nuggets have. Some people say larry doesn't stick around very long... Well the Nuggets are a team built to win now. Maybe Larry will give Carmelo some tough love like former Jerry Springer bodyguard Steve Wilkos does on his own show. ( go to you-tube and do a search for Steve Wilkos and you'll find out what i'm talking about) Melo needs someone to get in his face. He can't keep messing up. The last big name before him was John Elway... Elway never got caught with pot (Melo has twice). Elway hasn't gotten a DUI. Carmelo is running out of chances. It just seems to me that Melo wants to score his points and doesn't have the passion to win a championship.
Since KiKi Vandewahe left the general manager duties have been handled by three people. When other teams call they don't know who makes the final decision. Also several people call to ask about trades. How does this look to other teams? Maybe this is so we don't get another contract that will tie up the salary cap for seven years. All in all this team doesn't feel championship caliber. They are not that fun to watch. Sports is supposed to be entertainment. See-ya next year Nuggets.
P.S. At least the Knicks fired Isaiah Thomas. Then they said you cannot have any contact with the players. I hope Stan Kroenke doesn't buy into the Isaiah Thomas kool-aid.
DPA
May 6th Nepotism
Nepotism
As the regular listener to Artificial Turf knows, I also work at Jason's Deli. We have a strong crew here up until about a month ago. We hired two new people a father and son. We already have enough drivers to work but we hired them anyway. Oh yeah, the new workers are the father and brother of an assistant manager. It's horrible, they can do no wrong. I've worked in places where there was nepotism really bad and i've worked in places where the managers have been brain-dead, but not both. Everyday I get volunteered to go to the nearest Jasons deli to pick up supplies that we forgot to order. Of course its the assistant manager (Trisha) that messes up. By the way, the only reason she got the job was she fell in love with the old general manager who was an idiot. When the blizzard happened in 2006 she was going to spend the night at the deli with troy(the old general manager), She got her heart broken the day troy got fired and you know what I wasn't sad about it. I'll update the nepotism situation on a regular basis.
Note:
Nuggets/Avalanche owner Stan Kroenke: HELLO!!!!!! WAKE UP!!!!! The players have quit on George Karl. Carmelo Anthony doesn't care if he wins or loses/ doesn't paly defense. Kroenke supposedly knows basketball better than any other sport but he let KIKI give K-mart the worst contract in the league. Don't you want to shake Kroenke and try to get it through his head. As long as Karl stays nothing is going to change. Let the three-headed general management team do its job and find a coach that the palyers will listen to. Or blow up the team. My new anwser.... deconstruct the team. Trade Carmelo for whatever you can get. He will never change his ways and having him as our franchise player will get us nowhere. Like bringing back the run-and gun, no defense plan. That got us nowhere. Our three headed GM monster needs to sell Melo to someone... ( I wish we could fleece Isaiah Thomas right now). Can we trade him for a high draft pick? Derrick Rose, A.I. , Linus Kleiza, Nene, and Camby. 6th man K-mart, J.R. Smith, Chucky Atkins and Eduardo Najera sounds good to me. I know that lots of athletes get into trouible but being a superstar is a different level. Different standards apply. Our team is built to win now and with the coaching and the individual attitudes and atmosphere... it's not going to happen. So here's to being the Washington Redskins.. Having an owner spend money and no results to show for it.
